Friday, 29 April 2011 | 11:58 pm | 0 hearts♥
another 'C' to make it 2 'C' for daily grade.miserable semester really. I'm just getting way too much misery with this semester.
Last night finally went to jog like after months of thinking and I did. Manage to only run 4 rounds for the first time in so many many months I haven been exercise at all. It was tough and pain but I went on and felt really nice to sweat it out. I think it manage to help me sleep better too after sweating, I should plan to jog for moreeee :)
First time stayed in school till 9pm and head home. It's only initiation stage and going home so late what happen when the real thing comes - coding that is like going to happen in next 2 weeks. Till then everything will be disaster, I was thinking I manage to keep it up and would I just flunk and screw everything at the very last moment of before graduation.
12:29am - can't sleep
Monday, 25 April 2011 | 12:28 am | 0 hearts♥
I can't sleep. So I decided to write my diary which been left for months.I saw my wanted list set for 2011 and realise
5/9 wanted list items come true despite 8 more months to end 2011 :)
Hahahahas, like for years never know what I wanted for gifts & all now it's all here.
Flip through to see what else is being written
Joy, Sad, Deception, Adoration, Idolatry, Inferiority, Anger, Cries & many more.....
it's all in there.
An unhappiness today is a joke of tomorrow.
in doubt
Sunday, 24 April 2011 | 3:11 pm | 0 hearts♥
School started for a week. I was wondering if I had made the right choice to take up 5 modules with project on hand. I kept thinking about the difficulty in juggling them of course with new rules and policies it made everything worse for me. Feel that I really sucks for trying to be one when I have no capabilities - trying to wear a big hat when my head is really small.
Friday was a holiday, first time I was so glad that public holiday falls on weekday. I had a great time off on friday went out to Zoo with friends. 3 failed to turn up but 4 of us still had fun, felt retard to go Zoo for birthday celebration: cranky idea of mine shahs. But zoo is a nice place to go especially when last time we went was like in primary school days. Didn't manage to walk finish due to the rain and unprepared for the rain. Seriously I thought it was sad for elephant to perform when it's raining and audience boo when announce to be cancelled instead of being considerate for the animals. Our zoo animal are as precious as our citizens, you know.
Since it rain, we went to eat dessert at Plaza Sing. Boss was evil keep taking revenge shot on me when I didn't take picture of her or I only tried to take picture of others. Anyway I upload everything without house keeping ended up she uploaded 30 of my photos with….& she kept talking about bringing me to croc farm and throw me in on my birthday *evil* I remembered about throwing her into pool which is safer than crocs pool further more swimming pool can swim back leh, if throw me down sure handicap even if they rescued me out on time.
Had dinner at NEX because I said I never been there before thus we went there for dinner hahas. Dinner was nice :) but again I could not finish last 3 slice of the meat and did an exchange for watermelon. Ohh reminds me of walking watermelon we saw at the zoo. Find some spot to take pictures as memories with the birthday boy. Some part I just laugh uncontrollably till my face red, hot and almost tear.
It's nice to get out with friends and get away from my troubles but I guess they are the only cliques to be meeting and going out together, the rest ran away from me cause i'm too scary hahahas
We'll be meeting up soon, another getaway before UT starts :)
I'm stress.
Saturday, 16 April 2011 | 12:25 am | 0 hearts♥
Though I chose 5 days module but I really did not expect them to let me take 5 since my GPA drop & I'm out of top 10.
Imagine 5 days module with FYP on Saturday, I'm really worried. Worst part is, they change the rules of 15/15 and others which made it much more easier to flunk. Lastly, I just realized to graduate I have to take 5 core but I only took 2 core instead, I'm might not be able to graduate.
School fees is also another matter, imagine you paid more than $3,000 for those extra modules and end up you cannot get into the University. That's is terrible. Especially right now, financial seems to be a problem and my sister today told us she want to get into a private secondary school with 250/month school fees which 4 years will be $12,000 still have leftover for me to buy air ticket. I been bother by school fees months ago when I learnt that I would be the one paying my University school fees, apparently got to take loan.
I hate this. Didn't even tell me beforehand and now crap what the shit. Honestly I tried my best not to say this but seriously. Why the hell you have the means to live out there and use credit card like nobody business and what no money to pay come here take money from us and now my University fees are gone yet you happy go lucky there still want more money. This person is my dad's second sister who is now living in .. I forgot where but a very good place. Money Money Money why the hell are you bothering and messing up our life. Why is there a price to everything.
I doubt I will survive through this, I am determine to run this through but I am afraid I lose myself in this. Initially I never set my mind set on going into University but rather just go along and see if I will be able to make it in the end. When told to have to pay for these extra modules everything changes. If I am going to pay for this then I shall make this happen. It will be tough, tough. When timetable was out, I started thinking, envying others who are not bother by academic result but on long term basis this is not what I want. I don't want to have those thoughts in the past of regrets after regrets there is nothing I could accomplish but at least get good grade or sufficient for me to get a decent job and live through my cravings. (I don't have much cravings though)
Even if I get through this and accepted into University, another matter if I would be able to graduate there within 2 years.
Saturday, 9 April 2011 | 11:40 am | 0 hearts♥
Finally IEP ends & a week leftGlad that it ended before more things come finding me
Sad that it ended for time spend with interns was crazy
Made gifts for my department ended up I became walking zombie for days but happy with their compliments :)
